Stable:Manic is to Unable:Able

Can you not actually do it or are you just avoiding it? Are you avoiding it so much that by the avoidance the goal itself has become impossible? You thrash around inside your, screaming and tearing the hair out of your head, your eyes bleed tears. On the outside is a empty face, frustrated eyes. Just write, just write, just write, why haven't you started writing yet? If you started you'd have it done by now? I can't do it. Bullshit! You could and can do it. Come on you idiotic brat just write. If you tried than maybe, but you aren't even trying. Lazy sack of shit, you have so much potential and you sit there incompetently like your face just got hit by a shovel. But I have tried...I just can't. What a dumbass. You don't deserve to be able to write. Why don't you do us all a favor and just drop dead. Seriously, start writing right now. Right now, fucktard. Move your...can you even look people in the eyes? You are and should be ashamed of yourself.

I just want to sleep. I crave the mania and the productivity that comes with that. If I was manic I could do all this is just 5 mins. The temptation is unbearable. Be stable but lathargic or manic,uncontrollable, and efficient?